#incestsurvivor
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Genocide “is the deliberate killing of a large number of people from a particular nation or ethnic group with the aim of destroying that nation or group.” In other words, mass slaughter. All childhood sexual crimes fall under this category. It is a genocide on the human race – so it is indeed a racial crime. Why…
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There are worms that won’t harm you if you swallow them, but there are worms that can be extremely harmful. Incestuous relationships are like eating harmful worms and having them live inside you wreaking havoc. They create a system of shame and disappointment. Trustworthiness is no where to be found in these caverns created by…
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Exposing secrets can tear families apart. But hear me out, it can also bring them closer together. I’ve lost a lot of family members – pretty much all of them aside from my sister and mother. It’s been a long and lonely and painful road but there are so many upsides. It’s freed me up…
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On the discussion of fear, do you see God sitting in heaven holding a big stick ready to punish you? Mercy and grace can be differentiated as follows: mercy is the act of withholding deserved punishment, while grace is the act of endowing unmerited favor. In His mercy, God does not give us the punishment…
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Brene Brown has gone into great lengths about the gift that vulnerability is. In her book, Daring Greatly, Brené Brown describes vulnerability as “uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure.” In the life of a trauma survivor of deep childhood wounds, I pause at the notion that this is good for me. It’s like ripping off my…
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As a child, the first thing we learn when coming through childhood tragedies is to remain quiet. Don’t tell is the very first rule we are given. The problem is we did see, we did hear and we still didn’t tell. If we are ever going to change our pasts, we have to break the…
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There is a saying that “Jesus was born to die.” If Jesus was born to die, I was birthed to suffer. I don’t recall a day in my childhood that didn’t have suffering in it. Maybe I had moments where I enjoyed something – an ice cream, a bike ride, but there was always embedded…
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When we learn to articiulate what our abuse took from us, we can grieve appropriately and begin to heal. If we sit in a muck of undiscovery, never articulating what we feel, we stay stuck, unhealed and a stranger to ourselves. Why discuss it? If you were a child when these sexual crimes happened to…
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Pain, mercy, abuse – it’s all born out of rejection. When my father was dying he and I had a six-hour conversation. We talked about a lot. I asked him who hadn’t seen his pain. I pushed the question again, saying, “Dad, was it your mother who didn’t see your pain?” He looked down at…
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Children don’t have the luxury of allowing their terror to rein and that is life altering. When an adult is raped, they have recourse — most of the time they tell, they receive counseling, and sympathy. The perps might not receive full justice but an adult has many options to let their terror loose. A…