murder
-
I’ve told my story time and time again. every time I have fear. I tell my story any way. The woman my father murdered in front of me in 1968 – I’ve told that story, too. Now, over half a million people have been a witness to that atrocity. Praise God! Because he loves and…
-
Brene Brown has gone into great lengths about the gift that vulnerability is. In her book, Daring Greatly, Brené Brown describes vulnerability as “uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure.” In the life of a trauma survivor of deep childhood wounds, I pause at the notion that this is good for me. It’s like ripping off my…
-
Have you ever stood on the outside of a closed door and heard something bad happening on the other side? I have. And I didn’t open the door. What is that fear that stops us from confronting the truth? I don’t know, but I do know that there isn’t a day that goes by that…
-
Redeeming my past is a journey, not a destination. When I have memories return because I have allowed them free reign in my being now, it can be challenging. Successful processing of traumatic memories allows you to say, “The traumatic event happened, it happened to me, and it is over now. The complex ptsd workbook,…
-
On the discussion of fear — Do you fear the residual effects of incest will last a lifetime? In reality, it kind of does. There isn’t a part of my life that isn’t marred by the damage of incest. My entire childhood was ruled by this cruel master. There is a story of sibling incest…
-
On the discussion of fear — Do you fear receiving love? My childhood held little love. What I could receive, I got from a loving grandmother and uncle. Other than that, this little girl received a lot of rejection, hate, and abuse. That was yesterday but it effected how I lived. I didn’t pick people…
-
On the discussion of fear — Do you fear discussions? Discussions can make us feel vulnerable, right? Who will be right? Who will be wrong? What will “they” learn about me? And, on and on our inside critic begins. I rather enjoy the art of discussing today. It’s risky for sure, but it is necessary.…
-
On the discussion of fear — Do you fear relationships? I do! How do you come through years of childhood tragedy and believe that people are safe? You don’t. That’s the real answer. If you think about it, it would be ridiculous to trust people. Why would you? Who has shown you safety? Who was…
-
On the discussion of fear — Do you fear disease and illnesses? “As long as you keep secrets and suppress information, you are fundamentally at war with yourself…The critical issue is allowing yourself to know what you know. That takes an enormous amount of courage.” ― Bessel A. van der Kolk, The Body Keeps the Score: Brain,…
-
On the discussion of fear — Do you fear your dreams? Nightmares, night terrors, agony — that’s what pursued me through the night hours for most of my life. Dibilitating if I let them. Sleep was a burden to me, not something I looked forward to. The duldrums of life persisted whether I was rested…